Why do some people get defensive when I say, “I don’t believe children and adults should have sex because everyone under 18 is a child”?

I’ll try to answer this in the least defensive way possible.

I’m not sure I’m going to succeed, but I’ll give it a shot.

Yes, we all know there are some super mature, close-to-the-legal-definition teens that are rockin’ the maturity vibe extremely well.

Yeah, there are non-adult teens that don’t regret their relationships with adults and will look back on them with fondness.

Yes, a sixteen-year-old teen is not a baby, an infant, a toddler, a little child, or a pre-teen, and we already know that teen would resent being treated as such.

What people get freaked out about is that they are not adults. They’re close, but they’re not quite there yet.

We know that creepy adults are always trying to fudge the legal limit to take advantage of someone’s relative inexperience, youth, and naivete. The point is adults should know better and confine their dating, romantic, and sexual activity accordingly.

Throughout the majority of the world, that’s eighteen and above and I am perfectly okay with that. Legal adulthood means you can do the following besides having sex with other adults.  (This is not an exhaustive list.)

1. Join the military.
2. Donate blood.
3. Sue someone.
4. Get a tattoo.
5. Lease an apartment or house.
6. Smoke cigarettes, drink alcohol (non-U.S. locations), visit a nightclub, and gamble.
7. Book a hotel room.
8. Buy a car.
9. Serve on jury duty.
10. Work full time.
11. Vote.
12. Get a credit card.
13. Get married.
14. Open a bank account.
15. Change your name.

I’m not saying all of these things are without consequence. I’m saying the full weight of your decisions are finally and completely your own, and society and the law have to respect you and them as such.

It’s adults looking to exploit and take advantage of non-adults (whose actions don’t yet carry the full weight of societally-acknowledged independence) that squick people out.

And no, dear readers, this does not mean I’m one of those finger-wagging elders who think you have to employ the specious half-your-age-plus-seven rule or that adulthood should now be considered to start at 25 because of some brain development studies. Fuck that. If society grants my full adult rights, you don’t get to take them away because you don’t like how I exercise them. Ageism in reverse is still ageism. At eighteen, I was old enough to know when I was being talked down to and dismissed by people who thought they knew better than I did about my own damn life.

So, in short, if you’re an adolescent below the age of eighteen that wants to have sex, be as safe as possible by doing the following.

1. Masturbate (like I had to tell you). In lieu of that, …
2. Have your legal guardians get you protection and contraception and teach you how to use them correctly.
3. Choose someone else that’s also under the age of eighteen.

Once you’re eighteen yourself, choose someone your age or older to sleep with.